Just My Thoughts People

"Chocolate Rain" - Tay Zonday

To find out more about this self-proclaimed martian, PLEASE go to HHNLive.com to read the interview...

http://www.hhnlive.com/features/more/322

BET Continues to Disappoint

So with much hesitation I decided to sit down and watch one of BET’s new shows last night, “We Got To Do Better.” If you recall, the show was originally titled “Hot Ghetto Mess” and was based off of the website of the same name. The site would often post videos and pics of black people doing ridiculous things and wearing even more ridiculous outfits. You’ve probably seen most of these images in your inbox as I used to frequently receive them from my co-workers. At any rate, BET’s original intent was to bring the website to the small tube as if it would be part of their comedy line up or something, as if that’s what the black culture really needs right now. In a time where everything about us is being challenged and defeated, this was definitely about 10 steps in the wrong direction.

 So after some much needed criticism, the title was changed to “We Got To Do Better” and the shows intention is now to highlight everything that’s wrong, not only in the black culture but in general, and figure out better ways to be better black people. But lo and behold, a name change is simply a name change. From the first five minutes of the show, I already knew it was a lame attempt to back out of what was initially thought of as a grand idea. The host, Charlie Murphy tried his hardest to convince viewers that the show as an attempt to rectify wrongful and disgraceful behavior. I wish that I had been keeping count from the beginning because I could swear he said “We got to do better” at least 20 times. And it’s only a 30-minute show. So in between showing hot ghetto mess-ish clips, they have a street commentator who goes around asking random people questions of importance to test their ‘black’ knowledge. Questions were: “Who’s richer – Bill Gates or Jay-Z?,” “What happened first – blacks being able to vote or blacks being allowed to fight in the war?,” and “Who is Barack Obama?” which surprisingly a few people partially got correct.

So all in all, it was an awkward, non-provoking, weak attempt of a show. Even funny man Charlie Murphy couldn’t save it. I kept waiting for them to play the sound of crickets chirping whenever his solo commentary aired. Talk about needing to do better. I can’t find anything on BET’s website about it since it aired last night so let’s hope they decide to cut it short. Why don’t they just bring back something like “Teen Summit” and BET News????? All they do is run the same videos all day. Hell, even MTV has cut down about 90% of the videos and run more shows and these are some of the same shows that BET has taken and flipped into their own version. “Baldwin Hills” is the black version of “Laguna Beach," " SOB" is the black  version of "Punk'd" and they turned a non-MTV show and flipped it - "Hell Date" is "Blind Date."

 And I know better than to expect much from this urban station but they could at least put some effort into it. Don’t even get me started on that ‘game show’ “Take The Cake.” Sighhh I digress…

 And to add insult to injury…

Deelishis - Rumpshaker

Bitterness Besets Me

While scavenging through my roll of blogs the other day, I came across something that made me laugh and think all at the same time.  Bossip did a "Quote of The Day" on Melanie Brown in which she says about her new love:

“He’s the love of my life and I’m going to marry him. Stephen’s been a godsend. Eddie hasn’t been in touch once since I had the baby, it’s unbelievable. But Stephen has been a tower of strength. Stephen’s got a much bigger c**k as well!”

tsk tsk Mel B.  This is from the same woman who said she had planned to marry him.  So apparently the d8ck size couldn't have been that monumental of an issue if you were going to wake up to it every morning for the rest of your life.   But  why is this the card that  a lot of women play after a nasty breakup and most importantly, why do you trash your ex after it's over?  To hear about the endless blissfulness of a relationship that was ongoing for two years to all of a sudden hearing things like he was a liar, a cheater, the sex was bad, I didn't really feel that deeply about him anyway reflects badly on the bearer of these words.  It shows that either you were stupid to stay in a relationship for that long knowing that all these things were going on and it only ended because the other person ended it or that you are stretching the truth because you're hurt.

And do things like this (putting his lack of manhood on blast) really hurt a man?  I guess if it's true then it would but I would hope by now that people realize it's just a silly ploy to mask one's true feelings.  I've also heard that eluding to the fact that a man doesn't have a lot of money is another tactic as well in which case you just come off looking like a gold digger and yet and still, you were with his broke azz. 

And women aren't the only ones guilty of the bitter quotes.  I think men mainly use it in the face of embarrassment such as the classic case when a man tries to spit his top-notch game at a female only to get shot down.  You know what he says to that: "F8ck you bitch, you not that fine anyway."  Boy stop.  I was clearly fine enough to get your attention.   Comments such as this only make me mad for about a half a second and then I'm on my merry way.  I think it would take much more to hurt me, like "Your writing sucks."  But that's just me.

So the next time your ex goes on one of these tirades, just nod, smile, and keep it moving because you both know what the real deal is.

Charmed

photo: VH1

I commend Mo’Nique for her attempt to rectify the mishaps and behavior of young women, especially the young black women.  Admittedly, I was not going to watch Charm School when I first began to see the promos and commercials for it.  Although I religiously watched the debacles that were Flavor of Love and I Love New York, I refused to turn my attention to a show whose focus was on changing the lives of those involved in the highest rating shows on VH1.  Go figure. 

Charm School was in its third week before I actually sat down to watch it and turns out, it was much better than I expected.  My initial thought was that Mo’Nique doesn’t really want to fix these misled girls; this is just another spin off to capitalize on the spawns of Flavor Flav.  Instead what I realized was that she is giving them life lessons that they should have learned while growing up.  Kudos.  Week after week, the girls embarked on new adventures and life lessons that were intended to empower them and help them to make wise decisions, sensible decisions and to behave in ways that show that they do, indeed embody some form of common sense.  Granted, a lot of them didn’t get it and it will take much more for them to understand the ramifications of their actions and lifestyle, but she did manage to change quite a few of them.  I was surprised to see that Leilene made it as far as she did.  I didn’t really see much improvement in her or maybe I just need to go back and view the episodes again.  Shay (Buckey) endured, but to me it was apparent that she was brought up properly, maybe she was just a little defiant or was just going through a phase of finding herself.  Becky still has a little black girl inside of her (nothing wrong with that) but she also learned that it’s ok to be the white girl that she is. Larissa (Boots), being the loudmouthed spoiled brat that she is, still has a LONG way to go as evidenced in the reunion.  Brooke is still a whore and maybe it is true that white women and black women don’t perceive sex/oral sex/making out in the same way.   And much to my surprise, tears actually formed in my eyes as Saaphyri (Saaphyri) gave her heartfelt speech to Mo’Nique and Shay and won the $50,000.  I found myself being proud of her and happy for her and wishing that more women could benefit from life lessons such as the ones given my Charm School.

I watched the reunion show last night to first of all hear what Saaphyri ended up doing with her winnings and secondly to see what would happen with Shay and Larissa.  Sadly, the scene between the latter two was disappointing on so many levels and just goes to show that some black women still have a lot to work on within themselves.  They didn’t even want Larissa out on the stage with Shay for fear that a fight would ensue.  Finally, LaLa urged her to come out and you could feel that a brawl was on the verge of happening.  But when the two began squabbling with each other, Mo (as they affectionately call her) stepped out and shut it down.  She stated how heartbreaking it was to see that the two former best friends were acting so vehemently towards one another.  Then, while Mo is still trying to talk sense into them, saying how could they behave in such a way knowing that their parents are watching, Larissa disrespects Mo’Nique by telling her to shut up.  Mo got in her face to tell her some more and Larissa’s mother comes out to defend her daughter, which is not wrong at all but damn where you the first 22 years of this girls life when she was wildin out and acting like a child??  I often ask myself what’s wrong with the younger generation today and this is clearly it – the parents.  Why aren’t they raising their children? Why are they depending on others to instill values and morals into them?  Why does it take a village to raise a child, but when that village attempts to help, you discredit and tear down the village?

I say all of this to say that I have a newfound respect for Mo’Nique for recognizing the situations that black people and women are in and for taking a stand and doing something about it.  And for all of those who have kids, just know that your kids will grow up to be the person that you are, they will grow up with what you instill in them.  If you read books and take pride in yourself, so will they.  If all you do is watch videos and go to the club, spending no time with them, they will become a product of their outside environment…

Something New?

I’ve been thinking for a while now about race relations, and in particular race relationships.  Black men have a well-known infatuation with women of other races – Jeezy has a thing for Christina Aguilera, Polow is a self-proclaimed “King of White Girls,” and Kanye travels with a stash of white bearded clam and black meat porn.  So why don’t more black women date outside of the race?  I personally don’t see it much here in

Atlanta

.

I once had a non-significant date with a white guy and didn’t think much of it at the time.  He was a neighbor of mine back in college who used to make me lunch after we would get zoned out.  He was cool and we had pretty good conversation but that’s about as far as it went.  He asked could he take me out to lunch one day so went to a Mexican restaurant.  For about an hour we sat nearly mute as we ate.  It was pretty uncomfortable and it seemed as though everyone was watching us, or maybe I was just paranoid.  I could attribute the nervousness to my knowledge of his small crush on me, and doesn’t that always make for a weird situation when the feelings aren’t reciprocated?  Then, it was my first date with someone other than a black man and suddenly I was aware of it.  Nonetheless, we continued to be friends for a while after the date and when me and my roommates moved to another complex, I never saw him again.

I’ve never really thought negatively about black men and specifically white women, though I have been constantly bombarded with the rants and raves of many black women who see it as a dominating issue in their lives, and that bothers me.  They complain that black men who seek outside comforts are weak because of the stereotype that white women are more accommodating than black women; they aren’t strong enough to deal with a black woman’s strength - or attitude, depending on how you view it.  And while some men do think this way, there are some who actually find true love outside of the black race and what’s wrong with that?  But my question to these women is always “Why don’t you try it for yourself?”  And then there’s deafening silence.   For a black man to say that he prefers white women is really no different than a black woman saying she prefers bald-headed men or chocolate men, right?  A lot of women always say ‘niggas aint sh8t’, so try something else, right? I think love and lesser relationships are cool as long as they’re based on something real.  And by real I mean a mutual liking or lusting, not simply the fact that I’ll try this new thing since I have reached a status that will allow me to do so and dating this ‘superior’ person will make me look better in other people’s eyes. 

The few women who have answered my question have the same reply – they would never date a white man because they’re weak.  What???  Pressed further, weak means that they cater too much to their women.  Jeez!  You want a man to treat you good, but he can’t treat you too good.  Strange, indeed.  And not that black women should want to date outside of their race, but that’s such a strange line of reasoning to me.  And if they say they would date a white guy, it would only be for his money. SMH.

So would I do it again, under different circumstances (namely if I wasn’t married)?  Sure, I probably would if I ever found myself physically or mentally attracted to him.  And I say all of this to say to women that you should find happiness for yourself and not to dwell on anyone else’s choices.  If what you’ve been dealing with hasn’t been working, work on you, then find something different, something new.  Be open.

That being said, if I were to date white guys, here are my top five…

1. Travis Barker
2. Brad Pitt (before Angelina got hold to him)

3. Cary

   Hart
4. Justin Timberlake
5. Matthew McConaughey

Kelly Rowland on KING Magazine

Something I thought all you guys out there might enjoy.  I hope this isn't her future though.  That cd of hers has been pushed back two or three times and she hasn't even released a second single.  She's more talented and more attainable than Beyonce so I truly hope she gets her due shine, but until she gets from up under the Knowles Clan, I guess this is what we'll mostly be seeing from her.

This also has me thinking, why can't there be a publication like this for us females?  There are many celebrities out there who I appreciate and occasionally fantasize about.  I imagine it would just have to focus on celebrities (Boris Kudjoe) and athletes (Reggie Bush) because i can't quite imagine how it would look if my favorite rapper was on the cover and on second thought I have to think maybe it is best left to the females...

Meagan Good is Copy-and-Paste

 

I finally watched that dance movie, “Stomp the Yard” this past weekend (I know, I know but my nephews were watching it so I said what the hell).  First of all, let me begin by saying I never expected this to be an academy-award winning movie, nor did I really expect to like it.  I’m not the biggest fan of crump, it just looks funny to me, and a little dangerous (back-breaking, no?).  But nonetheless, I sat and watched as me and my sis-in-law carefully critiqued.  And by ‘critiqued’ I mean roasted the hell out of it from beginning to end.  In case you haven’t seen it I’ll give you a little summary – the main character (don’t remember his name.  Forgive me, but after 5 years of living the college life, my memory is completely depleted) and his brother (played by Chris Brown) are crump-battling against some Ese’s and since they won a sh8tload of money in the Ese’s territory, they felt the need to jump chris brown and his big bro.  The brawl ends up with Chris Brown being dead and off goes big brother to Atlanta to attend Truth University where he will be mentored by his aunt and uncle.  Big brother gets drafted into a fraternity, where he will obviously incorporate his crumping skills, falls in love with Meagan blahblahblah, you get the picture.

All in all, it was a pretty hilarious movie.  It’s very dramatic with the dance moves and all.  Every time big brother and the frats break out into dance, we see every single movement in slow motion which creates the most hideous facial expressions.  That alone was the highlight for me.  And the background music for the sad, emotional or ‘moving’s scenes were straight from the movie “Beaches,” or so it seems.  But the thing that bothered me the most was Meagan Good.  I’ve seen almost all her movies, and this is by far her biggest role.  She gets a lot of air time in this and she is the 2^nd main character.  So I was expecting to see her really get her shine but I was sadly disappointed.  For as long as I’ve seen her on and off screen she always looks the exact same – same black, wavy weave, same makeup, same smile, same pose.  And even more so, she plays the same role in every movie. It’s like you can just crop her out of one movie and implant her right into the next. Why is she always some down-azz side chick?  Her acting wasn’t exactly the worst but I’ve seen much better.  Me and my sis-in-law considered sending her agent a heartfelt letter requesting that she receive broader roles.  Then I thought, maybe this is what black actresses are subjected to.  Nope, not at all.  She is undoubtedly the most typecast actress that comes to mind.  And given further thought, there really isn’t another young, black actress out there who is the down-azz side chick type so maybe she’s just holding the slot until someone else slides in there.

Why Do We Love To Hate Those on Top?

It happens all the time – we support our favorite artists while they are considered underground, watch them blossom toward notoriety and then superstardom and then all of a sudden, we want to drag them right back down to obscurity.  Take your favorite power couple for example:  Jay-Z and Beyonce.  Somewhere between The Black Album and Hov's takeover of the music business, and hell, business in general, we have repeatedly tried to strip him of all that he has accomplished.  In the beginning, and even as recent as two years ago, we considered him to be the G.O.A.T.  We celebrated his successes, fought for his claim to the throne and now all of a sudden he's weak, he's lost his swagger.   And Beyonce reaps this hardship even more.  From America's little sweetheart to an over-appreciated, conniving bitch.  What happened??? It's actually quite simple – it's the crabs in a bucket mentality.  As long as everyone around us is slightly below our level, they're alright.  They feel equal to us and there is no way in hell they are going to outshine us.  But surprise, surprise!  That one little pesky crab has pushed himself above and beyond and catapulted himself right out the damn bucket.  And now we hate him for it because we were supposed to be there and we could have been there.  Why can't we accept the fact that Jay, ahem Mr. Sean Carter is a grown man handling grown man's business?  He no longer has time to spit about whips, chicks and chips.  He's done it ladies and gentleman. And as for his main squeeze, you can't knock her hustle either.  Granted, she may need to cut back a little bit just to avoid overexposure but nonetheless, she has worked hard for all that she has.   She didn't prolong her dream and didn't sit and wait for someone to discover her.  She asserted herself and set herself apart from all the crabs.  Take notes people.  Take notes.